I've been told by people more than a few times that I have outrageous stories. I agree with them 100%. I fully acknowledge the fact that I have the "entertaining" talent of getting myself into... situations. I've also been told that I should start forming these stories into a written collection. So I figured there was no better place to start putting some of these anecdotes together.
THE LOVE STORY:
"Anti Love at First Sight"
In high school I was that girl. The girl with the amazingly good-looking boyfriend. Captain of the State Champion dance team. Basically fit in with anyone. Got great grades. Student Aided for everyone's favorite teacher. Yes, I was that bitch. The girl everyone loved to hate. And what they loved to hate the most, was how I landed the hottest guy in the school. Well bitches, I'm not quite sure either... but I'm pretty sure it all went a little something like this...
So the love story begins during seventh grade. About mid fall, the female student body of your typical spoiled brat infested middle school, found their knees knocked straight out from under them as He walked across the grass to the portables. Mr. (not)Perfect had transferred from a school in the neighboring county. The girls were driven wild with his "fuck-this-place" attitude, gorgeous curly brown hair, Billabong "designer" hoodie, worn in to perfection high-top converses, and apparent "LOVE" for his cross county girlfriend. Within a week, stupid bitches like the ones I was told I had to be friends with, had written professions of love all over the bodies and binders. (when someone proclaimed love for another on their binder you knew it was serious!) I on the other hand, legitimately didn't get it.
#1. He had a girlfriend. If a boy willingly calls a female his "Girlfriend", you leave that shit alone. It's hard enough to rein a boy in, if that bitch can do it at least give her the luxury of enjoying it while it lasts.
#2. In middle school, all boys are worthless. I was going to go with stupid but then I remembered that is one fact that doesn't change with age...
#3. If everyone else liked him... there was no way in hell that I was going to agree. Flashback to the young rebel, punk rock, hardcore bitch years... If he was the consensus of "desirable" then I obviously ignored he existed.
#4. Crushes of the week were so much more fun than longing after a boy who was never going to give you the time of day. Hell. Crushes of the week are still fun. But back to middle school, relationships are never serious. So why not enjoy flirting with a guy, then his all of his bros in the following weeks until he comes back begging. To which you will of course give in to for about a week until you decide to tell him that you're better off friends, but he should tell his friend *Scotty* to call you.
Basically, I just wasn't having it. Fast forward a year later... August of eigth grade. BAM! When the fuck did Mr. (not)Perfect get so hot!?!?!? So yes, I gave in to the masses. Hung up my black Pac Sun hoodies and checkered converses and traded them in for some layered polos and American Eagle jeans. Traded my "you don't exist" attitude towards Him for the "let me at it" mindset. It's amazing what stupidity will overcome you over one hot summer fling, and your first make out sesh ... stupidity.
Lucky for me I had a class this year with Mr. (not)Perfect AND my extremely close friend The-Only-Black-Boy-In-School. One AIM chat and a promise to talk to Miss Push-up Bra later, TOBBIS decided to help me out on what would be one of the most grueling battles for love in my 20 years, so far, of existence.
To Be Continued...
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